Another week, and another new “miracle” medicine that will hopefully be the cure to….they really have no idea. The three most infuriating words in the medical language are “I don’t know”. I am constantly amazed by my own reactions to all of this. I forgot how easy it is to slip into the comfort of self-pity. Frustrated sobs have come on way to quickly, and way too often. But, my other reaction is a pure stubborn shout of “this will not stop me!”. My own wonder woman chant of “hear me roar”. Yet, every time I see another doctor, and they tell me they don’t know why I am sick I turn into a puddle. I want to shout “figure it out already! Cut me open and find something!”. But, that is the wrong way out. I have always known that patience is not my best virtue. Humph!
So, the next step is to attempt an all out healthy turn around. Become the green goddess, and exercise queen. That is all there really is to do for now. Wait, and try not to go batty. Practice my downward dog yoga poses, and guzzle grass. Lovely! Tomorrow I start yet another attempt to get back on my feet, and do little prayers and pleads that this new medicine will do the trick. I bought a new cookbook, and will force my amazing Michael to diet with me. A girl can’t be hungry and miserable alone!